The dog food is in the laundry room. I recommend filling the bowls on the ironing board, because if you do it on the floor they will knock it all over and probably knock you on your ass.Wow…I should probably give her a medal just for attempting to feed these monsters. I won't even go into the why...but just trust me when I tell you that every detail in this is necessary.
When you are filling the bowls, Talulah will start on your left and Gus on your right. Fill the scoop even with the top and put one scoop in each bowl, at which point they will switch sides (so don’t trip on them). Close the food container before you put the bowls down or else they will knock it over.
When you pick up the bowls, Talulah will jump up and down a little while Gus will crouch down and skid himself along the wall and then in a circular pattern into the family room. Straddle the doorway between the laundry room and the family room and tell them to sit. Tell them to “leave it” (several times as you put the bowls down…one in front of Gus in the family room and one in front of Talulah in the laundry room). Tell them “ok” and they will begin to scarf down their food (it only takes about 30 seconds). As soon as they start eating….close the laundry room door between them.
Gus will finish first, so wait another 10 seconds or so to let Talulah out and then pick up their bowl immediately. Congratulations…you have fed them.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Nature or Nurture?…You Be the Judge.
I was writing an instructional letter to a friend who is going to feed my dogs, and while reading it back, the sheer ridiculousness of my animals finally struck me. I thought I would share an excerpt of this letter with you for your entertainment/disapproval/amazement: